Is there anything better than Cholula® brand hot sauce? Blow jobs, I guess. Cold hard cash, too. Also, receiving cold hard cash for blow jobs. Oh, and Christmas and afternoon drinking and apple pie and girls in short skirts with skinned knees. OK, so there are a lot of things better than Cholula® sauce, but Cholula® is still pretty good. I put it on nearly everything — burritos, chips, fake chicken nuggets, girls in short skirts with skinned knees — everything. I’m not saying I’m addicted to it. I mean, it’s not like I’ve sucked dick for Cholula® or anything, but maybe I haven’t met the right person yet. Also, I steal bottles of it from restaurants so it’s not like it’s affected my financial situation the same way say crack or collecting 9/11 commemorative currency from Liberia has.
It was on a recent grocery trip, when it dawned on me: why not mix Mexican hot sauce with peanuts? You see, the Sachs company makes a Tobasco® Hot Sauce flavored peanut